Monday, June 21, 2010

For a moment, it all makes sense.

trying to clear ones mind from thinking about impending doom is really hard. I’ve told others how to think through it but the rules never apply to you, right? You want to stop the thought playing over and over in your head but there’s no breaks. Even doing things you need to do become hard to do and you have to force yourself to do them. Nothing even a bright sunny day can seem to cheer you up. Your watching TV and the show now run into each other, same stuff different channel, doctor saves life in last ten minutes. Bad guys get caught in the last ten minutes. All the problems you watched unfold get solved in those last ten minutes but before that the characters are totally lost for direction.

Then there’s an inspirational moment. I was near the door and heard what sounded like geese flying in formation, loud and very close to me. Crawling to the door I look out, it’s my girls babies. Four baby raccoons so cute, so small and mom is bringing them out to the world for the first time. The babies looked at me calling for them, “Babies.” That’s what all the little babies names have turned out to be since they grew up and now are here as adults. The albino raccoon had here babies. None are albinos like her, that light gray color but they are cute baby raccoons. One could fit in the palm of my hand. The innocents of the forest is here and I get to enjoy it.

Mom and the babies are at the back of the house now and I brought them several plates of food. Coming back, in the shadows I see what looks to be a cat, could it be Ms. Kitty come back to see me. It’s a little fox looking at me. I motion for the fox to come over to the porch and the fox ran up. The skunks are too busy eating to notice one more mouth. They are laying down eating enjoying the cool night air and a plate of food. They sure like pasta out of every thing.

Now that is making me smile. For a brief period I’m out of my mind and thinking about something else. I can use that to help break the spell of depression. This has turned out to be a nice night. The pain is gone for a moment.

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