Going to have surgery Feb. 2nd and Feb. 4th . It’s real major surgery and I’m hoping that everything goes well. That I don’t get any infections or major blood loss. As the days get closer the more mental stress I feel. I’m also having what I feel more problems. I lost another inch in height. I’m down 7 inches now. So hard to sit up or stand up without leaning over. My ribs have stopped me from getting any smaller because they are resting on my hips. That’s causing problems with my intestines. Everything I do take so much effort. It doesn’t matter what I take for the pain it still hurts a real lot. there’s x-rays of my spine below. It looks so bad. There’s a sharp bend which is poking out my back. It’s real scary thinking about surgery and the recovery. I think I’m more worried about the recovery then anything because that’s going to go on for months up to a year maybe longer. The doctor told me recovery would be a year and six month just for my spine to fuse together. They are doing eight levels in my back. To get at them they will cut open my stomach and take things out and work on my spine. The next surgery they will go in through my back. I hate they have to cut my muscle and tendons because they don’t grow back. I had surgery before on my back and I can still feel my spine where the cut was. If I’m this burned out before surgery I just hate to think how I’m going to feel after surgery remembering the other two back surgeries I had 20 years ago. My right knee has been giving me problems ever since I went to the pain management doctors and doing physical therapy. I only stopped physical therapy because I couldn’t stand on my knee. Getting up in the morning it’s so painful with the weight of my body on my knees. My back hurts all the time no matter what I’m doing. I need to get a few things before surgery like a walker. Looks like I’ll be missing this year because of recovering from surgery and leaning how to walk with a different shaped spine. I don’t think I’m going to be shooting many picture not like I used to. There have been days where I was in so much pain that I wanted the surgery that minute. I had pinched nerve and causing all sorts of pain not even moving. Moving made it so much worse. I’ve spent so many sleepless nights in pain where I couldn’t move. This last year has been real bad as far as pain goes. I’m hoping that my pain will drop off rather fast after surgery. It’s going to take a few month for where they cut to stop hurting when I move. Wonder if I should put some eye screws into the celling at places where I’m going to be laying down and use some webbing hanging down with a big knot or put a bar there to grab onto to help me up. I could use one in the bedroom and one in the living room by the couch. I think for the first few weeks I’ll be getting a lot of sleep. Going to have to get something to keep things moving because I got so plugged up after my first surgery. I didn’t realizer it at the time but after a week I had to go and it was the size of a baseball. Don’t need that again. I really hope this all goes well without any complications.